Don't feel bad, not a pang;

Good evening.

[And from the look of it, it's been a long one; her long white hair is pulled back and messily secured in place with a pair of pens sticking out at odd angles, and her eyes - vivid amber in color, a little alarmingly so perhaps - look bright as hell behind the rims of her glasses. She's clearly worked up about something, even if her voice retains that calm dryness that it usually carries; she's smiling, but it's a bit more like a smirk than a smile, and if we're all being honest it's a bit more like baring teeth than anything.

Somebody's excited.

At least the camera is still, presumably because she's got it set up somewhere; it's difficult to see exactly where she is, she's kind of all up in your metaphorical grill there.]

Since it seems my last pair of coworkers have discovered better things to do than staying in this region, or staying in this world altogether for that matter, I'm looking for a few people to help me out. Just with a few...experiments.

[And oh, her eyes are alive.]

You'll be compensated for your time, and you'll be granted the power to defy physics as you see fit.

And if you don't believe me...

[She moves back from where she's been all up in the camera's business, finally giving a solid view of the room; the ceiling is high, though the room itself is largely nondescript, and there's some sort of odd platform set up in the middle of the floor.

GLaDOS herself seems to have a rather odd pair of white boots on, rather than her usual, far plainer set; she glances up at the ceiling as though mildly uncertain of the height, takes a deep breath, and steps forward onto it.

Bang.

The sound of the plate being activated is a sharp, loud one, throwing her straight up into the air with enough force that it might as well be some sort of goddamn cannon (much like these fine pieces of machinery are prone to doing); she lets herself drop back down onto it, shooting herself into the air a second time, before letting her head drop forward, kicking up and over into enough of a flip to ensure she won't land on the plate again.

Those boots make an odd hydraulic whooshing sound as they kick in, ensuring she lands properly; she lands hard and it looks like it should have been jarring as hell, but it's worth noting that she lands on her feet and seems pret-ty good.

She approaches the camera again; she seems a bit breathless, but incredibly pleased with herself.]

So.

Any takers?

[VIDEO]

You know, there comes a point where you stop being surprised and you start accepting things as an inevitability. Gravity is always going to work. Eating paint is always going to be a bad idea. There's always going to be some mute lunatic running around and screwing things up.

Things like that.

[And a good morning to you too, GLaDOS; nice to see you're in...uh, good spirits, as always.

Of course, it's a bit difficult to tell where she is, given the angle of the video; it's definitely straight-on, as far as her face goes, but the long white hair she has tied back tightly, away from her face, seems to have gravity acting on it in a...weirdly upward direction. Either physics has temporarily shut itself off, or she's hanging off of something.

Spoilers: it's the latter. More specifically, her bed; she's got herself draped sideways over it with her legs braced against the wall, her head hanging down toward the ground.

It's a comfortable position, okay.]

Apparently I should add "not having five minutes' peace" to that list. Because I know for a fact that I didn't before being brought back here.

But then, the mute lunatic has been dealt with. And there are ways to make gravity less of a big deal than it thinks it is. And that's what science is about, isn't it? We're told that we can't do one thing, and we see the lack of point in moping about it.

So we get mad.

[Contrary to her words, however, she's smiling again; it's not a nice expression, closer to baring teeth than anything, but she's - ...yeahno, let's be honest with ourselves, she's not even trying...]

But while we're all beating the odds here, I'd still recommend against eating paint unless you've been instructed to by the proper personnel - after all, there's no point in being dumb about it.