neurotoxined | 005. [Video / Re-Intro]

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005. [Video / Re-Intro]

[VIDEO]

You know, there comes a point where you stop being surprised and you start accepting things as an inevitability. Gravity is always going to work. Eating paint is always going to be a bad idea. There's always going to be some mute lunatic running around and screwing things up.

Things like that.

[And a good morning to you too, GLaDOS; nice to see you're in...uh, good spirits, as always.

Of course, it's a bit difficult to tell where she is, given the angle of the video; it's definitely straight-on, as far as her face goes, but the long white hair she has tied back tightly, away from her face, seems to have gravity acting on it in a...weirdly upward direction. Either physics has temporarily shut itself off, or she's hanging off of something.

Spoilers: it's the latter. More specifically, her bed; she's got herself draped sideways over it with her legs braced against the wall, her head hanging down toward the ground.

It's a comfortable position, okay.]

Apparently I should add "not having five minutes' peace" to that list. Because I know for a fact that I didn't before being brought back here.

But then, the mute lunatic has been dealt with. And there are ways to make gravity less of a big deal than it thinks it is. And that's what science is about, isn't it? We're told that we can't do one thing, and we see the lack of point in moping about it.

So we get mad.

[Contrary to her words, however, she's smiling again; it's not a nice expression, closer to baring teeth than anything, but she's - ...yeahno, let's be honest with ourselves, she's not even trying...]

But while we're all beating the odds here, I'd still recommend against eating paint unless you've been instructed to by the proper personnel - after all, there's no point in being dumb about it.

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Oh. It's you. I was beginning to think that I was free of you for once, but no. Of course not.

[...He's glad to see you, okay.]

What's got you going on about all this anyway?

Well, it looks like that comment about not having five minutes' peace was right on the money.

[Her eyes narrow considerably at that; whatever's going on in her head at the sight of him, it's fairly plain that she isn't impressed.]

Tell me you didn't just show up here.

So what if I did? It seems our timing is as impeccable as ever!

[That's sarcastic though, and he's clearly not very pleased.]

[Oh, eyeroll.]

Look. I don't want to talk to you. You don't want to talk to me. Why don't we just go back to not talking to each other and get on with our lives? Normally I would add "Unless you have something worthwhile to say for once," but there's no point in creating false hope.

[Pause.]

In you, that is. Because the things you say are never worthwhile.

They are perfectly worthwhile! You just choose to ignore them! Which is really rather rude, might I add.

[He's not even going to address the first part of that statement.]

Really.

[It's either the most deadpan agreement or the most disinterested question ever, take your pick; either way, she shifts position on the bed, pushing herself up and turning over to lie on her stomach, setting the device down in front of her and flicking locks of her hair out of her face as she does so.]

You still haven't answered for why you're still talking to me, you know.

Oh. Well.

[That seems to catch him off-guard, and for a moment Wheatley's eyes dart to something off-screen. He forces himself to return staring her down.]

I figured it would be best to keep in contact with you. You know, to make sure you aren't dead. I don't believe death is permanent in this world, but I would hate to see you die by someone else's hand. That would just be insulting, really.

Insulting to me, maybe - I was designed to live forever.

[She's quiet for a moment, though the look in her eyes is no less hostile; clearly she's considering something.

After a moment, the feed switches over to something decidedly more private.]

Your little friend isn't here anymore. The one with the mask. Right?

[Wheatley's not sure what the lock is for, but her words get him to deflate a bit, shoulders sagging and expression openly upset. He hasn't learned how to control that just yet.]

Yes, he is. Back to his world, then; that's good! He can go wreak havoc with his machines! A bit of a shame, really, he was quite bright. I definitely would've liked to work with him again.

[Because discussing colleagues out in the open is a dumb idea, that's why.]

So I guess I can't rely on him. Too bad - he was doing a decent job at keeping you out of trouble and away from me.

[Ugh. Why is everyone such a headache around here...]

Well, you've already nearly destroyed my lab; if they set you loose here you're going to destroy this one. And I guess we can't have that.

Well if you're that worried about it, I can always go to Kanto. It'll put a whole region between the two of us. Of course that's hardly enough space, but I suppose we can make do.

[He knows how badly that upset her the first time and he wants to see if it will work again.]

Already?

[The word leaves her before she can stop it, and she seems more than slightly alarmed once she realizes it's out there; she brings one of her hands up in a firm but awkward swiping motion through the air, a rather vehement indication that that should be disregarded.

...Of course, once that's done something seems to occur to her; she relaxes almost immediately, that odd smile crossing her features again.]

You wouldn't. Not so soon, and definitely not alone. You have no backup that way, and you don't have my enrichment center to protect you, either.

Oh please, I can look after myself! Besides, I don't need anyone else!

[He's not entirely certain on that last point, but the fact that it's getting to her is something Wheatley is more than eager to pick at. He's smirking something fierce.]

Are you going to try to stop me?

[...Oh. Oh, she sees where this is going now.]

No. Why should I?

Well, you seem so bent out of shape about me leaving, trying to insist that I won't have your protection - as if I'd need it! - and saying that there won't be anyone else there... Well, what else am I supposed to think, hmm?

Oh, I never said you needed my protection. Just that you won't have my work to plagiarize.

You're nowhere near smart enough to prove yourself useful out there. You'll see that eventually.

I'll do just fine out there! You'll see! I'll prove just how smart I am! There's nothing you can do to stop me!

You waste a lot of time talking when you could be going, you know. If you want to get out so badly then just go.

Fine. Fine! I'm putting in for a transfer right now!

[And with that, Wheatley cuts the feed. Sure enough, he's putting in for that transfer because now he has to prove himself. Thanks, GLaDOS. Kanto really needed that.]

You been yo-yoing between home and here for long?

[His tone is neutral, but not judgmental or unfriendly.]

[Who needs tone anyway. GLaDOS' tends to be...a bit on the dry side, but at least she's not hostile; she doesn't seem too off-put by the question, anyway.]

I don't know if it can be considered very long. But this is my third time back.

That's more than anyone I've met before.

I guess a welcome back's in order. I'm Lee.

What an honor.

[It's sarcastic, yes, but at least it's not biting.]

And you can call me Caroline.

[That gets a wry smile out of him.]

It's a pleasure, Caroline. I take it you were in the middle of something when you got dragged here?

I'm almost always busy - I work in a very involved field. Science and innovations.

But we've had a bit of an...incident...lately. Made a mess of the labs. And now I'm back here, and not there to deal with it. Again.

Science and innovation, huh? I gotta respect that. Sounds like demanding work.

On the bright side, when you go back again things won't have gotten any worse.

[...okay, that gets a bit of a noise out of her. Not quite laughing, but it's close, and it seems to surprise her a bit.]

That's not how I would have thought to consider it, but you know what? I'll take it.

[Sure, he'll take it too.]

It's better than nothing, right?

So what kind of field of science are you in?

Experimental physics research. It's impressive, how much people will want to bend the laws of nature to their whims; we let them do it, to some extent.

And what is it that you...do, exactly?

I'm a history professor. Taught for six years at University of Georgia. Not quite as glamorous as experimental physics, but, well. Those who don't know the past are doomed to repeat it.

Well. They're doomed to repeat it until they repeat it so often that it becomes a moot point. There are only so many disasters that can be undone and all.

A good spell always does wonders, especially where gravity is concerned, though the lack of such arts in this place limits things a bit.

[...Well, she'll match your text with some of hers, for what it's worth. Might as well. In some ways it's more comfortable than video, in others it's a bit inconvenient, but it's workable.]

I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess you're a magic user, then. This place seems to both love and hate you.

Love because there's a surprisingly good-sized group of you here.

Hate because you can't actually use the magic.

Not really a fair tradeoff, is it?

If one cannot adapt past such a hurdle then they probably weren't worth the investment of magic to begin with. It should not be a crutch. There are other ways to go about things, one must simply find the proper way.

It was an adjustment period, of course, but I do not find it to be terribly intolerable.

That's an interesting way of looking at it. Very determined. Some might call it stubborn. But I'll call it determined for your sake. It's not a bad thing either way. And at least from the sound of it, it's only moderately intolerable.

What is it that you do, anyway?

I've been called worse things. Determined or stubborn are both well enough.
Many treat the magical arts as a crutch, and when faced with a reality without wither away. It's a waste of potential.

I've been having a grand time, really. It just took a while to get used to the pace of life here.

As for me? I train pokemon. What else does one do in this place?

That sort of adaptability is an interesting trait in people. Not something I really test for. But it's useful more often than it isn't.

And you know what I meant. You train Pokémon. So do I. But that isn't what I do.

Test for..? Are you a teacher of sorts, or one who administers exams? Of what nature?

I am quite content for the moment to learn as much as I can about these creatures and this world. So in essence one could say for the time being I research. What is it that you would say that you do?

Science. I do science.

I oversee a laboratory back home. We specialize in experimental physics research - basically, doing what we must, because we can.

That's an amusing approach to experimental physics. It gives a feeling of... questionable morals.

Of course, those who let morals stand in the way of research are rather fools pretending at science.

[...THERE ARE NO WORDS TO DESCRIBE WHAT HER FACE JUST DID, XEHANORT, BUT IT WAS DEFINITELY GLEEFUL.

AND PROBABLY MORE THAN A BIT DEMENTED.]

Yes. Yes, that's it! That's it exactly.

Finally, someone else who understands. It's been a while.

[He had an inkling that they shared a similar philosophy...]

It's a rather rare view of things. People are too bound up in the consequences of things to understand the learning that comes from the doing.

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005. [Video / Re-Intro]

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