GLaDOS (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
neurotoxined) wrote2012-11-27 11:50 am
neurotoxined) wrote2012-11-27 11:50 am
003. [Locked Video/Rocket Frequency]
[VIDEO / PRIVATE - TEAM ROCKET FREQUENCY]
[The video today is coming to you from inside one of the dorm rooms; it seems that GLaDOS has decided to take her work outside of the lab for the moment, primarily because it occurred to her at one point that she would, in fact, need to sleep and minimizing the time between wandering back to the lab and passing out sounded like a great idea. But that's beside the point.
The angle you're getting is from somewhere off to the side; it's primarily her hand for a moment before she pulls away after having turned the 'Gear on. She's currently sitting at what appears to be a really makeshift light/drafting table that she's MacGyvered together from a bunch of books, a table lamp and some plexiglass, the soft glow from beneath it illuminating her very pale features and glinting off those thinly-rimmed glasses of hers. She's not looking at the camera; she keeps her gaze focused downward while she works.]
Since we're all going to be stuck here for what looks like a ridiculous amount of time, I might as well get a few questions out of the way.
You people like destroying things, right? Of course you do. And destroying things from a distance is even better, isn't it? Otherwise we wouldn't have...oh. I don't know. Flamethrowers. And rockets. And other things that are designed to launch things that have been designed to be launched at you.
[No, she does not seem to care that she is paging the Department of Redundancy Department here; she just goes back to whatever it is she's drawing for a moment before continuing on.]
Of course, since it would be asking entirely too much for this place to be stocked with anything that would be at all helpful, I can't guarantee anything. But that doesn't mean it's all useless.
[She picks up the 'Gear then, bringing it over to that table and angling it awkwardly downward to show what she's been working on. It seems she certainly has been working on ways to get things from one place to another; what she's been drawing is pretty much something that crawled right the hell out of PokéSpe, and can best be described in three words - "portable Voltorb launcher."
She lets the camera hover over this...Voltorbazooka for a moment before setting it back on the table and getting it back to work.]
No idea if it'll work, and it seems like something else this place will put a stop to before it does anything good - but you would be really surprised at what you can manage with a bit of physics and what's probably going to end up being way too much spring-loading to comply with any sort of safety regulations.
If this place wants me to do science, I'm not going to argue with it. After all, as a great man once said - when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade.
Make life rue the day that it thought it could give you lemons.
[Well, that last bit is delivered in as cheerful a manner as possible, and the few seconds she spends finishing up whatever lines she's tracing out before she reaches out and clicks the feed off again are filled with some rather cheerful humming.
Nice to see the level of sanity in the science division hasn't improved any...]
[The video today is coming to you from inside one of the dorm rooms; it seems that GLaDOS has decided to take her work outside of the lab for the moment, primarily because it occurred to her at one point that she would, in fact, need to sleep and minimizing the time between wandering back to the lab and passing out sounded like a great idea. But that's beside the point.
The angle you're getting is from somewhere off to the side; it's primarily her hand for a moment before she pulls away after having turned the 'Gear on. She's currently sitting at what appears to be a really makeshift light/drafting table that she's MacGyvered together from a bunch of books, a table lamp and some plexiglass, the soft glow from beneath it illuminating her very pale features and glinting off those thinly-rimmed glasses of hers. She's not looking at the camera; she keeps her gaze focused downward while she works.]
Since we're all going to be stuck here for what looks like a ridiculous amount of time, I might as well get a few questions out of the way.
You people like destroying things, right? Of course you do. And destroying things from a distance is even better, isn't it? Otherwise we wouldn't have...oh. I don't know. Flamethrowers. And rockets. And other things that are designed to launch things that have been designed to be launched at you.
[No, she does not seem to care that she is paging the Department of Redundancy Department here; she just goes back to whatever it is she's drawing for a moment before continuing on.]
Of course, since it would be asking entirely too much for this place to be stocked with anything that would be at all helpful, I can't guarantee anything. But that doesn't mean it's all useless.
[She picks up the 'Gear then, bringing it over to that table and angling it awkwardly downward to show what she's been working on. It seems she certainly has been working on ways to get things from one place to another; what she's been drawing is pretty much something that crawled right the hell out of PokéSpe, and can best be described in three words - "portable Voltorb launcher."
She lets the camera hover over this...Voltorbazooka for a moment before setting it back on the table and getting it back to work.]
No idea if it'll work, and it seems like something else this place will put a stop to before it does anything good - but you would be really surprised at what you can manage with a bit of physics and what's probably going to end up being way too much spring-loading to comply with any sort of safety regulations.
If this place wants me to do science, I'm not going to argue with it. After all, as a great man once said - when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade.
Make life rue the day that it thought it could give you lemons.
[Well, that last bit is delivered in as cheerful a manner as possible, and the few seconds she spends finishing up whatever lines she's tracing out before she reaches out and clicks the feed off again are filled with some rather cheerful humming.
Nice to see the level of sanity in the science division hasn't improved any...]
[VIDEO]
That looks absolutely fascinating.
[If he could Do Science he would so be in those labs right now creating Voltorbazookas right along with you. But unfortunately, science is a bit beyond him. ...That's probably for the best, to be honest.]
How much do you want for it? I can offer you more funding for your research if you can produce weapons like that on a large scale.
[Outfitting Team Rocket Grunts with Voltorbazookas? BEST IDEA EVER!!!]
[VIDEO]
However, for the time being she seems pleased; she still hasn't quite worked out how to shot human affect displays, so the result is that she's giving you what amounts to the creepiest smile in the history of anything ever, but at least she is making an attempt.]
It's a bit stupid to offer commissions for something you don't know will work, you know. Not what I'd recommend. But I'm sure you're not a stupid person, so that makes it a bit of a moot point, right?
Give me time; once it's out of beta and ready to be released, I'll let you know what we're looking at in terms of funding. And then you can have all the guns you want. Promise.